Moving Through Self-Doubt & Insecurityfeatured

“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.” -Lao Tzu

We tend to criticize ourselves before we give thanks for our lives. We dwell on our past than be grateful for the present moment. We point out our failures and flaws rather than embrace our uniqueness and celebrate the gift of our life. Our strengths. Our wisdom. No one is immune to self doubt and insecurity, but it’s how we embrace our insecurities that makes all the difference.

Growing up I hated my nose. I came from a European line of Polish and German heritage so my “big” nose was part of my genes, it was bound to happen.

When people talked to me I thought they were staring at my nose. Sometimes I couldn’t even look at them because I felt too embarrassed, ashamed of my face.

Yet, people always complimented me on my big eyes and long eye lashes. They would comment on how they dreamed of having thick and bold eyes to complement such a a beautiful set of hazel eyes. I still focused on my imperfect nose. I spent all my energy finding ways to criticize and hate myself rather than focusing on accepting my uniqueness and falling in love with every it.

Working down from my face I use to hate my runner thighs. I thought they made me look too strong, too masculine. (Honestly my calves were bigger than any of the boys). Yet my teammates always admired my runner legs and would say to me, “If only I could have calves like you.” I would blush never really believing them. I felt ashamed. I wanted thin model legs, not legs of strength and power.

When I began to see what others saw, my large, bold and beautiful hazel eyes and eyelashes, so long they looked unreal (when people would ask me if they were fake I would laugh thinking I’m just a simple girl I don’t have time to glue on fake eye lashes every morning) and legs that represented feminine strength and beauty, I found my self doubt and insecurities about my nose slowly fade away. Maybe I needed my large nose to balance out all my other bold and fiery features. A little nose just wasn’t suited for a woman like me!

Look at yourself in the mirror and accept yourself for who you are today. Remind yourself of how you fought to become this person. Embrace every unique piece and part of it. Why? Because there’s no one else like you. 

I won’t ever change my nose, Photo on 8-15-13 at 9.17 PMor my legs, because I found myself falling in love with them. I wake up excited to show the world what I have to offer and I don’t live in shame or guilt around my body. It’s mine, all mine.When you learn to re-claim your own body and your self esteem you will find that life simply begins to flow and you shift your energy and focus on experiencing joy rather than dwelling on fear. 

It’s up to you. You are meant to shine, inside and out. Go show the world who you really are. Love it. Embrace it. Never let go.

“Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit.” -E.E. Cummings

About the author


Feeding The Heart is a blog and resource dedicated to empowerment for whole heart living after trauma. I'm a writer, trauma sensitive-informed yoga teacher, and a trauma survivor here to share my story and journey of holistically healing.

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