Many times we want to love someone for who we know they can become rather than loving them completely in this moment without expecting them to become the person of our dreams.
We may have good intentions, but at the same time we are taking away their humanness by projecting who we believe they can become so that we can love them better or more.
Love is a gift. It can’t come with strings attached. It’s not a business transaction, rather it comes directly from the heart.
When we love without attachment we come to understand what love actually is: freedom to be who we are.
If we can’t truly love a person without expecting, or hoping, for them to be what we believe is a better, higher version of themself, then we aren’t really loving them now, we’re saving our love for them when we feel they have come to deserve or earn our love. That is attachment, not love.
We must gently remind ourselves that love is a gift and it’s not a gift that needs to be saved for a special event, it can be offered now to anyone.
Learning to love in the present moment means learning to love all of the people that surround us. Our love is not simply reserved for a romantic partner, our family, our friends, but also strangers on the street–even ourself.
Are we holding back loving ourself in the present moment because we don’t feel worthy of the gift to receive love? Or are we holding onto expectations that we feel need to be in order to give our love?
When we learn to love in the present we learn what it actually means to love our wait rather than wait for it to happen to us. We are allowing life to unfold on it’s own time with no agenda. Holding back our love only pulls us away father from life.
Sometimes we get caught up in our negative thoughts and clutter in our mind. Instead of focusing on all the reasons why something or someone wouldn’t/shouldn’t/couldn’t work, focus simply on what is in front of you without judging or labeling.
Focus on loving everything and everyone in front of you. When we take more time to look at the good, the positive, rather than dwell on the negative or what we feels needs to change to have our life be “perfect”, then we accept that in this precious human life we are just making more room and space to love.
When you are able to release your judgment and attachment to a person or a situation you don’t get caught up in the story line of “what if”. Rather you learn to be present in what is. Life becomes more peaceful and simpler. It doesn’t mean you won’t have hard times, but instead of allowing anger or attachment to take over, you give yourself the gift of peace of mind, of loving in the present moment.
At the end of the day the only control you truly have is how you share your love. It’s a simple, but profound gift to yourself and the world. Let yourself be present for it.
You love simply because you love.